Why is it that tragic things that happen to you are easier to remember than happy ones?

Simple question, like most of my good memories are bad ones and its hard for me to pick out good ones, I know they have happened but I can never really seem to remember them, but when the tragic things in my life has happened I can remember like was yesturday, and I’m not only speakin on the virginity thing either. Maybe it happens cuz I have had more bad than good happen in my life :-/

I believe that tragic things often have more of an impact on a person’s life than happy things. When tragic, painful things occur in a person’s life it also leads to alot of negative emotions such as depression, guilt and shame which are long lasting emotions that often dwell. While happiness is often short lived in the moment situations and tend to fade to the back of a person’s mind. It also has to deal with the person. I believe some people find it easier to remember happy things and push out the negative things that have happened in their lives so they easily remember happy thoughts but cant recall horrible ones. Thats my opinion

cause tragedy inflicts a major part of your subconscious..whereas happiness dosent..

You experiencing little good in your life often will cause the bad things to overwhelm it and i believe that people concentrate more on the negative and loose the good things that have happened. I myself seem to remember horrible memories more than happy ones. The only happy memories i can recall are ones i wouldnt allow myself to forget. I wrote them down in as much detail after they happened so i could always remember there is something positive in all the negative. You could try doing that so you remember your happier memories more.

Good answer thx

maybe because tragic events usually have an impact on us and it’s in our nature to hold on to things both good and bad. Maybe it’s also because we tend to focus more on the bad things, like what could we have done differently? why did this happen? etc and because of this we loose sight of what really matters aka the good memories

Thx for the tip :-)

your welcome im glad i could help

The bad things that happen, especially the more tragic ones, are harder to let go of because they trigger off more intense emotions (betrayal, guilt, etc). Deep down we wish that the bad things never happened and it sticks to us like a scar (..but if you think about: if you never went through any bad situations, how do you expect to learn?). Pleasant memories give us happiness (obviously) but only stay for a temporary period. We take it for granted, really.

i think happiness is something we seek.. whereas sadness is something thrust upon us..

and we always remember the things we don’t have a choice about more than the decisions we make ..

Well my brain blocks out bad things that happened to me… I dont know y but it does so it’s not the same 4 me…

I think because we tend to replay bad events in our minds more than we replay the good events. I mean when I think of significantly positive events (depending on the person, marriage, graduation, birth of child, getting a dream job, etc), how often do we really think about those times and how much time do we spend thinking about it? I mean we then go on raising children and being married and doing our jobs and that brings us satisfaction but the event itself doesn’t last. We’re happy in the moment, and then it goes away, and life goes on. Bad stuff, we hold onto. Deaths, divorces, natural disasters, those impact us for longer than just the day it happened. Even if it is on just a psychological level.

“It is a curious thing, but as one travels the world getting older and older, it appears that happiness is easier to get used to than despair. The second time you have a root beer float, for instance, your happiness at sipping the delicious concoction may not be quite as enormous as when you first had a root beer float, and the twelfth time your happiness may be still less enormous, until root beer floats begin to offer you very little happiness at all, because you have become used to the taste of vanilla ice cream and root beer mixed together. However, the second time you find a thumbtack in your root beer float, your despair is much greater than the first time, when you dismissed the thumbtack as a freak accident rather than part of the scheme of a soda jerk, a phrase which here means “ice cream shop employee who is trying to injure your tongue,” and by the twelfth time you find a thumbtack, your despair is even greater still, until you can hardly utter the phrase “root beer float” without bursting into tears. It is almost as if happiness is an acquired taste, like coconut cordial or ceviche, to which you can eventually become accustomed, but despair is something surprising each time you encounter it.” Lemony Snickett