Should I tell my best friend that I'm beginning to resent her?

I got bullied 6 years ago and now even though now at 17 I appear more confident and bubbly deep down I’m still quite insecure. It doesn’t help feeling like my best friends shadow. She’s way prettier than me, more confident and boys are attracted to her unlike me.

eg I met this guy last year and we got on really well so I introduced him to my best friend. Now he might say a quick hi but then go hug my best friend and start flirting with her! I don’t care about that as I don’t like him but it’s the fact that just like pretty much every guy i’ve encountered ‘romatically’ they practically ignore my existance. Or guys will speak to me just to get close to her.

I feel so bad because this is my best friend who’s been there for me for years, the first person I speak to if I have a problem. I don’t want her to think I’m being rude when she comes to me with problems of how to reject the long list of guys after her and I seem uninterested but I can’t help but think ‘at least your in this situation!’

its becoming more obvious that in the 2 weeks ive been distancing myself from her but I don’t know to do? it’s the only way I feel like I can cope!

Should I tell her how I feel/ what can I do to start feeling better in myself?

Answer #1

I think you should definitely tell her how you feel because if you don’t she might think she did something wrong, which she didn’t. She’ll understand. Girls are jealous creatures. I wouldn’t worry about the guy situation, relationships really aren’t important at such a young age. They’re nice to have sometimes, but not a necessity. Focus on school and you’re future. When the right guy comes along, he’ll like you for you and not you’re bestfriend. Seriously though, don’t let your insecurities and jealousy, ruin your friendship.

Answer #2

You need to understand that there really are guys that are interested in you, just not the same guys that are interested in your friend. The guys that are only talking to you to get closer to your friend are tools and are probably only going for her because of her looks. I totally understand how you’re feeling because I used to feel the same way about some of my friends. I would feel bad because my friends would have boyfriends and get a lot of attention from guys, but I always felt like the ugly ducking lol. But anyway, turns out that there were several guys who were interested in me, but I was too focused on who was interested in my friends that I figured no guys liked me so I never really paid attention… Does that make sense? Kinda like how you can tell when a guy has a crush on another girl, but you can never tell when a guy has a crush on you. It’s all about perception. I found out that my current boyfriend had a crush on me for a couple years, but never talked to me because he was too shy. I actually thought he really disliked me before we started dating because he would never talk to me in class hahaha. ANYWAY, I can tell you now that there are plenty of guys who are interested in you, but you just aren’t paying attention. Stop focusing so much on your friend and just learn to be happy with who you are. It’s hard, I have trouble accepting myself sometimes, but it’s the best thing you can do for yourself.

Answer #3

Thankyou so much for your comment ‘Khaili’ it made me smile! knowing someones been through what im feeling atm makes me feel abit better:) congrats with your relationship and you’re right; im really going to try hard to focus on being happy with myself

Answer #4

Aww you’re welcome, and thank you :)

Answer #5

Communicate….be honest…for YOUR sake

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