why cant i, and other people just accept my body?!?

You say your mom thinks you are starving yourself, but you never say if you actually do. Seeing as how you think you are fat at that weight I am going to assume you have been (since you haven’t said otherwise). I have struggled with an eating disorder my whole life and here is something I noticed about what you typed. You never talked about you and what YOU do. You only talked about how the people around you are hurting you. You say everyone thinks you are starving but you never say if you are. To someone who has dealt with this before, this screams a confusing mix of denial and a cry for help. From the little bit of information I am getting from you I think you need help. The hardest part is admitting to those that you care about that you have a problem because they will all try to help. For me, I sat my family down, asked for PROFESSIONAL help and told THEM to stop trying to fix me by forcing me to eat. Here was my rule for those that are in my life “If you haven’t met with my therapist, or if they don’t SPECIFICALLY tell you that you can do something to help me, shut up. Don’t tell me to eat more, don’t shove food down my throat. If you expect me to trust my therapist, you do too.” You need to lay down the law, but that is what your family and friends need to do. Now here is what you need to do: -you need to be honest with yourself, starting with this “my mom THINKS I am starving myself” and turn that into “my mom KNOWS, because it is the TRUTH.” -get professional help -LISTEN to the professionals. THEY know what they are doing. Trust me I thought I knew better, until my best friend sat me down and told me that if I am at this point, I obviously don’t know what I am doing. -Eating disorders usually root from a deeper issue. Cut out your distractions that will stop you from getting better. I had a very destructive friend and family members and I cut them out of my life so I could get better.

There is hope, you are at the same age I was at and while I still struggle, I am much healthier. Stop this before it gets so much worse. It gets better!