my book "numbered on an island"

what do you think of my story so far? this is numbered on an island. Chapter 1 A little disagreement “Zzzz SNORT !” “Ahh!” Oh just David, gosh his snore could kill Goliath! “Ner!Ner wake-up!Come-on Ner!” I called, trying not to wake her too harshly she was only 6, I loved her & she need’ent wake up this early anyway. David although conntroling & nerdy as he was snored like a fat lady sings! (If of course the fat lady snorts a lot!)I was not about to endure my older brothers agonizing snoring by myself so I would wake Ner,well hey why not David? Well lets just say me & David dont exactly get along very well… “Hush! some people are trying to sleep here you know!”A nothing but controlling voice yelps to my attempt at waking the little Ner. “well David if your so desprate to sleep I would just love to help!” He had pushed a button he will no doubt regret pushing! My fist was at a threatining position held high to the sky no matter who it was facing. “STOP IT C2!”Did she just go there? I would’ve been fine if she’d called me 2 but C2?That was just too far. “Ner!!”Ner gulps she should be. Any one would if they were expeiriencing the scene she was.My mennacing fist had pivoted with my body to face her. “Calise please dont, she didnt mean it”David was begging (a very self-satisfying thing for me) but with a purpose a reasonable one for once. “Yes I did!”A very brave Ner snaps back. “David get her out of here in case she needs a head start.”I tell him fearing for my baby sister’s safety. Horror stricken, David nods urgent on a mission to protect his sisters, dispite his dislike of Calise he loves her & trusts her he knows he can trust her knowledge of when she is not safe to be near. Staying were I am I try to calm down I will take a walk. I sigh grabbing my oh so familiar walking stick & think. Think about everything.I try to stray from the subject of were the heck I came from but once again I find my self carving pictures into wood not really consiuse,I wonder how did my family of three get here? Who put us here? Does any one besides the helicopter man who brings our provisions know of our tiny little not very quit our peacefull island?Why are we numbered?Why I venture going deep into the ultra never ending forest of my thoughts,am I not only numbered but lettered?Are there more of us,numbered or lettered? my thoughts now have completly tangeled me in their sticky slimy vains drooping low to snag me embracing me.Most of all more painfull than anything else,who are my parents?Were are they?Do they miss us?Did they abandon us?Did they want to?Shaking my head I look down at what I had created there was a huge pile of carved wood, buetifull to say the least but most intruiging a carving of my parents how did I remember them, I have no scene no picture in my head no moment that I hit pause the world went got a camera and took a picture.But it was there vivid & detailed on that peice of wood,a tear running down a mothers eye. She held a newborn baby in a pink blanket,and a father stood near a 2 year old struggling to walk,and a little girl sat on acre bebind them.Me. hoped you liked it

Answer #1

it was good! but maybe you can start out saying that your on an island and then have the iccident with Ner and David

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