My life is going down the drain

This is going to be a long one, but please, please listen, I REALLY need help: I hate to go on complain mode again, but I feel like I need to get this off my chest, nobody else is listening, maybe you guys can help. I was just thinking about unfair life is in general, especially to me. I’m a very nice person and I almost always try my best to be nice to others and treat them with respect, but I just feel like I don’t deserve all of the bad things in my life. Let me list them:

  • Not only am I ugly ( and have had people make comments), but I have a bad body shape.
  • I have never met my father or anyone on his side of the family
  • It’s just my mum and lil bro, so we can’t afford much ( new clothes, mp3 players, cell phones etc) WE”VE NEVER EVEN HAD A CAR!!
  • I only have 1 friend ( Thank God she’s a good one)
  • I used to get teased really bad in gr.7 and 8 and I havn’t been the same since, I was always quiet to a degree, but now I’m even more so, plus I’m very nervous
  • Nobody pays any attention to me in school
  • None of my family likes me and they’re not involved, plus, my good old mum had kinda turned them against me
          I know self-pity isn't good, but I can't help it, this is all too much. I just don't feel like I've done anything to deserve all this. I;m not saying I expect life to be perfect and I could certainly deal with most of those things alone, but having it all together? That's a whole other story? WHY ME??? Why couldn't it have been someone else? I see beautiful girls at my school and I'm not saying they don't have problems, but they're not to the extreme of mine and at least they look good. The thing is, they treat people like dirt, act high n' mighty and are generally very shallow. I don't understand why the people who actually deserve these things get let off the hook and people like me, who are always compassionate and rescpectul pay the proce.Now please don't go on with the " Looks don't matter" speech, because it's time for us all to cut the bull shit and open our eyes to the fact that they matter a lot. They shouldn't, but they do. Nice looking people are generally treated with more respect, have more friends and get farther in life. They say every dog has his day, do you think I'll have mine? Please help!!!
Answer #1

Oh, and about the money: so you’re not spoiled, congratulations! Brighteyez, in my town, everyone’s got new ipod’s and their daddy buys them a new car on their 16th birthday, and theyll get into great colleges because they have “connections”. Not having money sucks, I was always lower than everyone else in that way. But you know what? I’m so proud for not taking what I have for granted, and not being handed things- someday you’ll see that it only makes you stronger and wiser.

Answer #2

I do understand what you’re saying, and I’m so sorry things are so difficult for you right now. It is very hard not to have self-pity, but I promise you (I know from experience) it does not help you at all. You ask why these other girls don’t have problems to the extent of yours, but think about it: your problems will dissolve with time, you will have the chance to get a job and go to college and make a life for yourself- but THEIR problems, being mean and treating others poorly, those will stick with them a lot longer unless they are forced to change. You say you only have one friend. Think about those that have none! My take on it is that if you’ve got one good friend in your life that you can count on, you’re doing alright. And yes, looks do matter to a lot of people, but let me tell you something: I never thought I was beautiful. I thought I was fat, ugly, had horrible skin- the works. I did try to take care of myself and eat right, and eventually I found someone that thought I was beautiful the way I was. Looks may matter to a lot of people, but honestly, are those kind of people worth worrying about? I don’t think so. And if you can truly trust that you are a good person, and that you do your best to treat others with kindess and compassion, you’ve got a lot more going for you than you think. And, as for your family, I know how that feels. My family and I have always been very distant, but that’s just an unfortunate thing in my life: I won’t let it ruin everything for me, so neither should you. Lastly, those who are kind and considerate may not always be rewarded, that’s the part about being genuinely nice that can get tough. You don’t do it so people will give you recognition for it, it’s just who you are, and no- it’s not fair, but that’s how it is. In the end, though, you will find that being kind and loving has helped you and given you more in life in the long run than those who had it easy and weren’t quite so caring to others. Good luck, and if you ever need someone to talk to, feel free to funmail me.

Answer #3

Thanks so much

Answer #4

Don’t worry lil lady, things WILL get better. Life is funny that way. I felt like you when I was a freshman in highschool. My senior year I finally got a part-time job at a clothing store and made sure i bought me “something” every paycheck. It didnt matter if it was just a T-shirt. It didnt have to be name-brand. Just by having something different to put on made me feel more confident. Bottom line is… I stopped paying attention to those around me and concentrated on what I could do for myself. People look at you like you look at yourself. If you feel like you’re the “ish” even if you don’t look it, your confidence will build-up. Then your body language will show your confidence. Pretty soon YOU’LL be the one “everyone loves to hate”. :)

Answer #5

Trust me, if you haven’t accepted christ and put your love in him, that’s why things are it is now. You just have to keep praying and believing that things will get better and be as nice as possible to your family. If you find a quarter or some money on the ground, and you see who dropped it, give it back, but if you don’t see them give it to your mom. Even though you haven’t met your birth father, that doesn’t mean you don’t have one. Your father is God.

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