I fingered my girlfriend fr the first time tonight but it ended without her having an orgasm and I felt really bad aout it.
I'm 23 and never had a serious relationship. I'm a virgin. I've never done anything with a girl apart form kissing until I started going out with my girlfriend a month ago. There are a few different reasons I haven't been with a girl before but I won't bore you with that.
My girlfriend is 17 and although she is a lot younger, we are very much in love. She is also a virgin and ha never done anything with a guy before. We have been seeing each other every other day and have slowly done more and more together. We both want to take it slow, mostly becuase we feel it will be more fun that way and it will mean more to us than doing everything in one night.
So tonight we are laying with each other and we agree for me to put my hand down there and finger her. Although I've never touched a girl there before, I thought I had a pretty good handle on it but I guess I was wrong.
Don't misuderstand me, she was enjoying it. I had to stop once because my arm hurt. But after trying really hard my girlfriend sorted just turned back to me and started hugging me. I asked what was wrong and she said nothing. I asked why she hadn't c*m - if it was my fault but she said it was okay, that it was nice. I asked again and she said "to be honest, it (the fingering) doesn't turn me on."
I felt really bad but when we talked about it more I she eventually told me she doesn't c*m when she fingers herself at home. She does it for a while and it feels nice but she doesn't orgasm even then. She does have orgasms though, when she just thinks about me and stuff sometimes - without fingering herself at all. Even when watching TV and stuff during the day. Just siting there thinking?!?! How crazy is that?
She revealed she had actually had two orgasms when we were foreplaying recently over the past few weeks. But I didn't know! She 'kept it to herself'. I asked her to tell me whe and it was just a time where she had straddled me and we were kissing and caressing intensely and with her moving up and down against me with all our clothes on - simulating sex.
It was nice to know that she had had orgasms with me but this thing about not being turned on by fingering is a bit sad because I really get turned on by doing it to her.
Any advice or anyone care to enlighten me as to how/why my girlfriend has orgasms like that??
Firstly, all women are different, and it's actually very common for women to not be able to climax from fingering. For reasons that will continue to plague mankind, every woman seems to have a different way in which they need to be stimulated in order to climax.
Secondly, although men should never give up on trying to make their women climax, women can often enjoy sex and feel a sense of gratification without having an orgasm. Sometimes they push you away with a big grin on their face without climaxing- let it be.
Thirdly, she climaxed just by thinking about you!?!?! Dude, you seriously do not know how lucky you are. When and if you do move on to full on sex (only when the time is right- preferably after she turns 18!), imagine how easy it will be for you to bring her to a climax. So seriously do not feel bad.
I just fingered my girlfriend for the first time today and she didnt have an orgasm either. she gave me a handjob and made me cum so I thought it was only right ot return the favor. I fingered her and when I first put my fingers in she said it hurt so the whole time I did she didnt really enjoy it because of the pain. I feel your pain man! I want to please my woman too. but just give it time and you both will learn and I hope you guys have a fun, orgasm filled life together. dont give up hope cause I know I wont.
I think its sweet that you guys can talk about this and you really do care for eachother:) I cant orgasm any other way than just dry humping my boyfriend. The media has tricked us into thinking women orgasm every time they have sex, but only a small percentage actually can. If your girl said it felt good, it means that it did, but some women cant orgasm from fingering sex and or oral:) Shes very lucky to have you though:) x x x x
why dont you just both be more like open maybe shes embaressed or feels guilty because shes the only one getting anything and yur not not meaning that in a mean way bt I always feel self concious if im recieveing and havnt gave anything back :)
She's SEVENTEEN. She's inexperienced, and so are you.
It won't just happen, you have to get familiar/comfortable with each other (learn which buttons to push). That will come with time...
when I finger myself, I don't cm the only time I ever reached ogasm was with a vibrating shower head don't blame yourself :)
you just gotta do it a bit better make noises when you do it like o year oo year it works 4 me
