My brother.

As a kid, my childhood was pretty rough; and I’ve gotten over it. And I have an older brother who seems to continue dwelling on our past as though it’s such a horrible thing. Our childhood was filled with many personal issues which have made him into a very controlling older brother.

He likes to state that he knows me, and locks me up in the house. He doesn’t like to let me leave, fearing that I’ll become a bad kid, when I know better then that. He likes to act like a parent and say that he’s very mature when in reality he just can’t see that I’ve suffered just as much as he has, but I’ve become a stronger person because of it.

Whenever I achieve something, he likes to put me down saying that it’s worth basically nothing to him. It’s like he’s trapped in this world where time doesn’t move.

He has never allowed me to express myself, and tell him how “I” feel about what happened. He basically tries to get anything that he wants by making my dad feel guilty for isolating us as children. So for example he’d say, “I want a my own room” or something like that. And if my dad were to say no, my brother would go “I deserve it, remember what happened when we were kids?!” He’ll be leaving next year since he’s 18 but I don’t think he’s ready for it.

And it really bothers me, that he doesn’t seem like he’s going to change. He likes to verbally abuse me and put me down as though I’m inferior to him. Of course I don’t let him get to me. By my ethnicity standards, I have to obey elders. What can I do to get him out of his shell?

It’s effecting my home envirnment and ability to interact with kids my age. And I’m sorry about the extremely long question.