Love of a student for a Professor...

Try to find someone who is closer to your age and available (not married). this relationship with the older man will just break your heart because he’ll never leave his family for you and you’ll always be just a lover (easily dismissed if things turn sour). There are many gay people in India as well as in other countries so don’t feel alone. The most complicated is trying to find them and make friends with them so you can have a normal social life without having to pretend you are heterosexual. It might be hard to leave your first love behind but sooner or later you’ll have to decide what kind of relationship you really want and deserve. I think you deserve someone that will love you back as much as you love them. Not someone who is scared to love you and be with you. Take your time, make new gay friends and date new people. it’s the only way to really move on and get over him. Hope this helps.