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How to live with a heavy drinker?

I have been with my husband for 12 years, married the last 10 of those years. He has been a heavy drinker for almost the whole time we’ve been married. Well, recently he’s had some health scares, and had a DUI. I thought those things would have an impact on him and make him stop. Or at least slow down! Not to mention the fact that I’ve been telling him I need him to stop because I dont’ really always feel connected to him anymore. He does - but doesn’t - want to change. Any advice?? Please?! ~Still in Love

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Answer #1

Dear tonyfan, It’s not that he doesn’t want to change…he is an addict and they cannot stop on their own especially someone who has been drinking this long. If you are fearful that he will abuse you then you must leave ASAP. He has to go to rehab…this is the only way he can stop. In rehab they are monitored and taken care of through withdrawals. This is important since once an addict starts withdrawals they will do most anything to get their drink. In rehab they get counselling to help deal with this mind set. You should also be in counselling. They will give you the tools to help yourself from being an enabler. Enabler allow the person around them to drink for their own reasons…perhaps you are afraid to be alone, perhaps you are afraid of conflict etc. So this is why it is important for you to see a counsellor too. Sue…good luck

Answer #2

Tell him you are leaving until he is ready to help himself, then do it, it is only going to get worse unless you start a change in his and your life, think about it, then pray about it for guidance, protection and help.

Answer #3

MAKE him get counseling. Tell him how important it is to you that he gets help. Tell him he needs to stop drinking so that you two canhave kids some day and you won’t have to worry about him being drunnk around your kids. My dad had a drinking problem to, and my mom didn’t really do anything about it(I don’t think) and they divorced when I was 1. So just try to get through to him yourself. And don’t wait for him to have a heart-attack.

Answer #4

dose he get mad when he is drunk or dose he hit you dose he hurn you mentaly

Answer #5

You need counseling too. You can’t make him go but you can go. This will help you deal with the life he is pulling you through. When someone lives with a Acoholic they get sick too, you need help

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