I sort of want to get therapy.

Please only read this if you are going to comment, and know anything decent about how to cope with eating disorders. Thanks.

Right now I can’t cope, If I’m honest. I think I’ve developed an eating disorder - infact, I know I have. Its been going on for about 8 months, for the first few it was just ‘Ugh, I look fat.’ then after it was paranoia. Starving. Puking up. And now I just can’t stop. I’m fed up of acting all happy. I can’t cope, and everyone thinks I’m fine and dandy. Even my bestestest friend doesn’t know I seriously feel like giving in. I want to tell my mum to take me to get some therapy (one-on-one classes with someone professional… talk about how I’m feeling) I think it would help. although I want to lose weight still. I’m half and half with this idea. I want to keep losing weight, but I’m afraid she’ll get me to eat ‘healthily’ again. But I also reallly want someone to talk to. But I have no one. No one would understand. Please, please, help me about what to do. I didn’t go into details about how I’m feeling because I can’t. Sounds weird, I just can’t put it into words. PLEASE help?