How should I feel about this ?

So I’ve been with my boyfriend for ova a year and we right not aren’t together trying to work things out. So I told him that if we where to get back together he would have to stop drinking and doing drugs witch I don’t think is out of line (I don’t drink or do any kinda of drug). Now I could be wrong! And he said that if he has to change then so do I! witch I am ok with, but it just seems like he was coming up with things to pick on me! like ok I get the whole sex thing he wants more sex fine 3 times a week isn’t enought then ok. then he goes on to that my driven needs to change and that I need to not care about doing my nails and being so pressie, and then his phone died but I think he had more he wanted me to change now is either of us wrong? was I right to ask that of him? and was he right to ask those things back? I just don’t know how I feel about this whole situation now I guess cause it was turned around on me, but I’m just trying to help him from doing stuff that could in time kill him! please help!