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How can I get a better writing style?

I don’t like my writing style.

At first it seems too simple, and everything goes too quick. Like as if it goes to one thing or another.

But then when I try putting things in it to make it a bit better, it ends up getting complicated, and I’m scared the reader will be confused!

I’ve read somebody else’s writing, and I really want it to be like that. It’s the perfect writing style! Here’s one of the paragraphs she wrote:

“Kailee…”

Slowly my senses came back to me. The cause for the arousal of my awareness was the calling of my name, though it sounded warped and very, very far away. I groaned slightly, scrunching up my face and rolling over, attempting to block it out. But it was very persistent for a disembodied voice.

“Kailee…” It repeated again and this time I became aware of a pressure on my shoulder and the feeling of a slight shaking. Light began to permeate the darkness and the quiet lull over my mind slipped away faster and faster by the second. Besides the voice, I became aware of a dull and repetitive roar, systematically followed by a crash. I was also aware of a solid, rather gritty surface beneath me. Eventually I gave in as I became aware of the fact that I was awake, slowly fluttering my eyes open to be met with a dimly lit gray sky.

I love her writing style so much! This wasn’t published into a book, it was published on the internet on quizilla.

And she’s only 4 years older than me(17)! I know I wont be as good as her, and I don’t want to copy her or anything. But I want to have writing something like her’s :)

Thanks!

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Answer #1

If you read a lot of novels, and get more familiar with different words, you will probley start using them a lot more often. And if you come across words that you don’t completely understand, it wouldn’t hurt to look them up. I found that once I started learning new words, I started using them more often and it increases your vocabulary.

Answer #2

read a lot, and put lots of time into whatever you plan to write. for me, when I’m really into my story, it just kind of…flows out of me. I don’t have to like think about it or anything. if that happens to you, you’re doing well.

Answer #3

The style of writing you illustrated paints a mental picture. A picture is painted one stroke at a time. I suggest that you write down your original sentence as a guide for what you want to say. Then, using another sentence, elaborate on it by including the colorful details you find pleasing. In time you will see that it takes a calm focused mind and lots of practice. Enroll in some writing or public speaking classes. You will find that they help develop your thought process in that direction. When I write, I often include more commas and semi-colons than may considered appropriate; because I want the reader to pause an instant, between my brush strokes, to give their minds the time to grasp the whole concept of my statement. I hope this helped.

Answer #4

I don’t know if this is good advice but I’ll try my best to explain what I’m trying to say

Okay, When I write stories, I picture everything that is happening, just like a movie. I like to give my character real personalities of somebody else. I put myself in the character’s perspective and I pretend everything I write, is happening to me. That way, I could express and FEEL the emotions of the character as he/she goes through events.

I don’t know if I’m making a lot of sense, 

   xoxo
    ErRorinlife
Answer #5

By reading books, and taking bits and pieces of their style and then mixing it all together and making it your style is one way.

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