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How can I be more assertive with my boyfriend?

Another question to annoy (just so you know I do search my questions to see if they have been asked before, I have also tried variations of the questions but they all seem to be rather off topic). Anyway on to my question:

How can I be more assertive with my boyfriend?

While in most cases with my boyfriend I ‘wear the pants’ as my friends like to put it, but when we get into private & are being intimate I feel as if I lack courage & I let him kinda take over (not to say that I don’t do anything, I just let him have most of the control as what’s going on), to be honest I actually like having him in control in that situation (I also know I can stop it whenever it goes to far) because outside intimate situations I am at least slightly assertive.

Anyway could anyone give me any advice to be assertive in a kinda… I dunno, sexy way? I don’t mean in a really dominant way. But guys have mentioned they find assertive girls sexy & that. We’ve hit the stage where we’ve been ‘exploring’ each other’s bodies & while I actually don’t mind exploring his I sometimes am a bit worried about how to go about it. I know he would like it, as his mentioned it to me before that he would find an assertive me ‘intresting’, though honestly I would just like to try it & see how it makes me feel.

Could anyone give me any advice ? My thanks in advance.

EDIT: I Am NOT Talking About Having Sex With My Boyfriend. There Are Things Besides Sex (:

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Answer #1

Then maybe you could clarify this for everyone> “We’ve hit the stage where we’ve been ‘exploring’ each other’s bodies & while I actually don’t mind exploring his I sometimes am a bit worried about how to go about it.” Exactly what does exploring involve, if its not done in a sexual way??

Answer #2

I never said that I wish to engage in premarital sex and to be honest I don’t want to have sex at this age. I’m all for waiting until I’m maried.

Answer #3

Many teens say that “having sex” is considered slutty, but “just fooling around” is no big deal. Whether you’re having intercourse or “just” outercourse — sex play that doesn’t involve vaginal intercourse, like oral sex — many of the same issues apply.

Despite what some people might think or say, oral sex does count — because just as with intercourse, there can be emotional and physical consequences to consider. Oral sex is sex Hun, no matter how you look at it!

Answer #4

I find it so sad how 15 yr olds need to be posting these kinds of questions. Wait 10 more years and try these things with your husband. You’ll be better off in the long run. Chances are you wont end up with this guy, so I personally dont see a point to it all. All this intimacy at such a young age, causes nothing but emotional problems after the relationship ends.
Premarital sex can detract from a strong relationship and a dynamic sex life. All too often, premarital sex ends up a self-seeking, self-gratifying experience. After intercourse, one partner might be saying “I love you” while the other is thinking “I love it.” Very often premarital sex occurs in the absence of total and permanent commitment.

Answer #5

I was also not talking about oral sex.

While I appricate that you are trying to help, it is not helping. Though I thank you for taking the time to leave some advice, since that is what this site is all about.

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