What are really funny clean jokes and answers?

A man took his dog to the vet. He asked the vet, “Help! My dog is cross eyed! Can you do anything?” The vet picked up his dog and looked in it’s eyes. After a while, he grunted and said, I am sorry, I’m gonna have to put him down. “WHY! Because he’s CROSS EYED???” “No!” The vet replied “He’s really heavy, and I am about to drop him!”

why did the chicken cross the road?

to rpove to the possum it could be done.

ah ha lame I know

Here are a couple of jokes. Take your pick.

Jake was dying. His wife sat at the bedside. He looked up and said weakly, “I have something I must confess.” “There’s no need to,” his wife replied. “No,” he insisted, “I want to die in peace. I slept with your sister, your best friend, her best friend, and your mother!” “I know, I know,” she replied. “Now just rest and let the poison work.”

Yesterday I went to the doctor for my yearly physical. My blood pressure was high, my cholesterol was high, I’d gained some weight, and I didn’t feel so hot. My doctor said eating right doesn’t have to be complicated and it would solve my physical problems. He said just think in colors; Fill your plate with bright colors; greens, yellows, reds, etc. I went right home and ate an entire bowl of M&M’s and sure enough, I felt better immediately. I never knew eating right could be so easy.

A man walks into a doctor’s office. He has a cucumber up his nose, a carrot in his left ear and a banana in his right ear. “What’s the matter with me?” he asks the doctor. The doctor replies, “You’re not eating properly.”

um actually it’s Na-cho cheese,ya know like Nachos?

There is a clerk at the butcher shop, he is five feet ten inches tall, and he wears size 13 sneakers. He has a wife and 2 kids. What does he weigh?

Meat

what do you call cheeze thats not yours ? not-co-cheeze

lol lame I know but some people like lame jokes such as my self

Two men walked into a bar, the third one ducked.