Girlfriend troubles

Okay, this will be a long post I just want to fill in on all the background information before I ask my questions.

My girlfriend and I have been together for only 4 months and we already live together. Things were great at the beginning and we had no problems at all. After living together for a month we would start to bicker about little things but nothing serious. She got mad at me one day about something silly and I wasn’t in the mood for it so I got ignorant back…not enough (in my eyes) to cause her to become a jerk. Well I got ready for bed that night and she decided to go on the computer and then call someone on the phone at the same time. I didn’t know who it was but from the bits and pieces I overheard it seemed like she was talking to a guy. About a half hour went by and I was feeling kinda frustrated but I was trying to think positive and not assume anything. She came to bed and fell asleep. I was still awake when her phone received two text messages one right after the other. She didn’t wake up and curiosity got the best of me and I check her phone to see who it was. Well it was her ex boyfriend (of two years) and all I saw of the second message was “If we get back together…” and nothing else cause I didn’t open the conversation. It was enough to piss me off though so I woke her up and confronted her about it. She got mad that I checked her phone and denyed talking about anything like that with him. I told her it wasn’t right to call her ex when she got mad at me since she hadn’t talked to him at all since we’d been together. Well she didn’t get where I was coming from and continued to blame me.

Things went downhill from there to the point I decide to move out. By that same night she wanted to talk things through and work through our problems. We talked and came to an agreement and I felt I made my point with her so I moved back in the next day.

Things were great for another month and then one day we are sitting and watching football (Dallas vs Carolina) and she starts texting and asking me questions about the game. I figure she’s talking to a girl and answer. The questions continue to the point I get up and ask who it is and does she want me to just explain the game to them and she hides the phone so I can’t see who she is texting. I give her a suspicious look and say why are you trying to hide your phone…and she then shows me who it is…a different ex-boyfriend, this one she was with only 2 months. So I can’t help but feel a bit upset cause she tried to hide it but I let it go and just sit back down and continue watching the game while she texts him.

I trust her and let it go but two days later while she is back in the shower getting ready for bed…her phone gets several text messages in a short amount of time. I didn’t think anything suspicious or look at the phone trying to find something, I did pick it up and see who the message was from so I could let her know in case it was important. Her family is all in Hawaii and the Philippines so sometime she does get messages or calls from them and she always takes them immediately. I check and its a girlfriend of hers from Hawaii so I start to take the phone back to her when I look down and see a conversation with her ex again from that same day. I look, only because I’m curious of what he was saying to her, and see that she said she was going to come see him in two weeks and they were both saying they were excited.

I felt my face turn red and my heart start beating really fast and I continued back to her, I opened the bathroom door and asked her where she was going and handed her the phone. She saw that I saw the text message and she just laughed it off and said she was just messing with him. She asked me if I really though she was going to fly down to texas, where he is stationed, on her birthday. I told her no, but thats not the point…that kind of discussion is inappropriate to do when you are with someone. Since then things have continued downhill and I’ve told her I’m moving out when her sister gets back from Hawaii and that things are pretty much over between us since she can’t understand how I feel about this thing with her ex’s. She keeps trying to change my mind by trying to cuddle with me in bed or giving me hugs but when I question about her feelings and see if she will not hide things from me and talk inappropriately to ex’s she just goes back to blaming me for looking again. I am still a bit torn for some reason and just want to know what everyone thinks I should do.

Am I wrong for feeling the way I do based on our history, and am I wrong for checking her phone out of curiosity? What do you think about her feelings toward me? I haven’t been in a complicated situation like this and after being told that I’m wrong by her so many times a part of me starts to believe though I still feel its not my fault and if she’d leave her ex’s in the past and cared about a future with me then she would understand where I am coming from?

Thanks and sorry for the long boring story.