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How can I get my family to let me have more freedom?
I’m eighteen, but I still am being treated like I’m not an adult. I waited years to finally be this age so I could do the things that I would like to do, such as dye my hair, get a piercing or tattoo. I live with my aunt who is a Catholic school teacher and my grandparents; who are all very old fashioned and if I were to just come home all new they’d have a heart attack. I’ve tried talking to them about giving me more freedom but they’re just not having it… I don’t want to just say screw it, I’ll do what I want. But I want to be who I am.
Whatever it is they are worried about, just start displaying a sense of responsibility and show them that you are capable of making good decisions. They will have to start giving you some space sooner or later.
I am sorry that life has not been great to you, but now is the time to start to become independent. Do well in school, get a job, and try to make more mature choices. Also start being upfront with them. Discuss your ideas for a tattoo or piercing with them and LISTEN to and understand their reply / rejection. Maybe you all can reach a compromise? Tattoos have often been called ‘a permanent reminder of a temporary feeling’. Piercings - not so much. BUT much of society will prejudge you for either, and your aunt / grandparents may want to protect you from that.(There are some jobs/companies that you can’t work at if you have visible tats.) You are dealing with (I am assuming) very conservative caretakers and you may not be allowed any tats or piercings until you move out on your own.
I should have read your profile first. You are already in college (congratulations) and working (double congrats because both at once is tough). While you are in college and dependent on your aunt, it would be best to respect her wishes. You can still ‘discuss your ideas’ with her though, but again LISTEN and understand her thoughts.
Take care of yourself, and Good Luck!!
Having freedom to do those things isn’t all it is cracked up to me. We are condemned to be free each in our own way. And we will always be enslaved to our chief desires.
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