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Embarrassed of my dad.

Im embarrased and I feel bad- but, heres the thing.

This guy I recently started talking to asked me who my dad was. And im really embarrased to tell him. I did though. I said “my parents are divorced, I dont talk to him at all. He’s crazy- but chris long.”

I live in a small town- everyone’s parent’s know each other’s and my dad’s on drugs. He started after I was born, and declined rapidly from there. My mother divorced him after he made several attempts to kill her. Im embarrassed to say that that’s my dad- who doesn’t have nice clothes, because he spend’s his money on meth. To say he’s crazy, and I can’t be around him because I dont know what he might do.

I know myself that he has a disease called addiction- like cancer. I used to be angry at him, now I just feel sorry for him.

Im not comfortable enough with this boy yet to get into details.. But im embarrassed of him. I tried to laugh it off, he said “ that’s what I thought, my dad know’s him” and I said “ haha- that’s embarrasing, he’s on drugs’s- we havent talked in years.” but I dont want his parent’s to be like “ oh I know who her dad is, that girl’s probably trouble.” ya know? What to do? Help-

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Answer #1

if he judges you because of who your father is he is not worth your time. trust me on this. he is your father, no matter waht, and I’m glad you four it in your heart to forgive him. you’re right he is sick but you need to stand up for your father oand defend your self as well. people do bad things for a reason or reasons of their own, I was sick, I’m an addict in many ways and of differentt hings, but that does not make me a bad person. I was insane when I id drugs too, okay, but I got help and I got better, an dalthough I’m not proud of things I’ve done, I’m still proud of what I become and what I over came. I got a hold of that sickness to be myself again, and myself turns out to be a really kind and loving and gentle person, with plenty of reason and smarts and talent , anda lot to teach other people. Ihope your father can come around too, but don’t let ignorant people make fun of your family or think bad of them, they ahve no right and to. nobody is better or worse than anyone else. eveyrone got their skeletons in the closet, some of us just got ours pushed out and uncovered. good luck and take care.

Answer #2

Addiction, as you know, is a disease. Your Dad is sick and his brain is scrambled. He might decide to get help before he dies (detox and sober living, or at least Narcotics Anonymous), but you can probably get help now. Try calling Alcoholics Anonymous there in your community at … 118 and 7th St # B5, Coeur D Alene, ID - (208) 667-4633‎. They should be able to put you in touch with an Ala-Teen or Ala-Non group, or the narcotics version. Both groups are for friends and families of drug users. It has been shown that besides helping you deal with things, joining is the biggest single thing that MIGHT help your Dad. Take care of yourself, and Good Luck!!

PS if things get confusing/bad, you might put in a call to a radio show called Loveline from 10-midnight (Calif. time) sun-thurs. It is hosted by Dr. Drew Pinsky who is a board certified, practicing doctor, and an addiction medicine specialist. Or just listen online to a live shoutcast at www.lovelineshow.com at the same times.

Answer #3

if his parents say anything like that… tell him too tell them your dad is not in your life so you do not have a bad influence in your life… it should shut them up lol

Answer #4

You need to realize that most people probably already know that you don’t have contact with your dad (being from a small town and all). They also probably know who your dad is. Most people will not judge you because of your father, unless they are ignorant.

Try not to be too hard on yourself, you can’t help who your father is. Besides just because he gave you life doesn’t mean that your life will be like his.

Best of luck.

Answer #5

he’s been everywhere to rehab, many times. he spent all his inheritance in six months, not giving us any. he’s 45, and been doing this since he was about 25- were kinda over trying to get him help. I mean we still pray for him and stop- but avoiding him is all we can do. he’s crazy, and doesn’t want help. he’s done methodone clinics, about everything imaginable- and none have helped. I hope the best for him, but im sure at this point if he got off, his brain cells are so dead from everything, it wouldn’t matter too much :(

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