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custody?

Hi, I told my husband I want a divorce and he told me that if I divorce him he will make sure I will only have supervised visitations. I don’t want to go through court I tried my best to change his mind for joint custody but nothing works. I am the child’s care giver 24/7 I don’t even smoke anything like that. We live with his mom and they both tell me that if I divorce him I will have sup. Visit. they tell me that they will tell the Judge that they think I might run away with the child (I never ran away or take him out of state without his permission ) and the judge will give them custody , they say cause I don’t have a job and a place to stay they will win. I just want to be a part of my boy’s life, I want joint custody because I want him to have a father in his life, maybe my husband’s wants to hurt me but he will hurt the boy too, if he really loves him he shouldn’t take him from me like I don’t want to take him from him. Can I lose custody? Will I be able to get help from the state till I get a job and have joint? My son is 3 y/o.

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Answer #1

Start talking to someone who deals with domestic violence issues. If you can document domestic violence, the chance of him getting joint custody is slim to none (at best he’d get supervised visitation). Of course he’s telling you all this to scare you. That’s how abusers sick and twisted minds work. They need to control you, and they’re using your child to do it.

This is the website in new york.. http://www.opdv.state.ny.us/ This is the hotline: 1-800-942-6906

Just one thing, please always sign out of this website when you leave here, and it is best if you use a pay phone and such if he checks your phone statement. In fact if possible, try to use an outside computer.

You are very strong for wanting to get away from this. A lot of women end up living in abusive relationships their entire lives. You are also caring, you dont want to leave your child behind. Just remember you can get through this. You will survive, and you will have a better life…

Answer #2

well my mother got a divorce with his husband a while back and since she speaks only spanish I had to go thhrough it with her as a translater and I understand that they cant take your kids away for any reason unless your mentally ill, or the kids are in danger! they will assign you a mediator in wich he will decide what is best! you should also tell the mediator all this they are threatning you with! I wouldnt worry as much if I where u! the mediator always does what is best and if your records clean I guarrantee you that they will give ou joint custody! :)

Answer #3

You must have a Lawyer to fight for your interests/rights…I wish you the best !!

Answer #4

Your best bet is to contact a local domestic relations dept and a lawyer.

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