Would you rather blend in or stand out with your peers?

And stout

Stand out.

Standing out can be bad in a way.. sometimes people are intimidated by you but they can’t figure out why so they try and make you crumble.. some people don’t like inviting you places cause you always get the attention.. you’re called an attention seeker, people see you as the loud one even if you rarely say much;; you’re aura is just loud..

I think life would be boring to just blend in with everyone, but I can say from experience that standing out is not always a good thing. All through high school I was the one who stood out. Which meant I was always blamed for trouble at school simply because I was always noticed. People were b*tchy to me because (I now know) they were intimidated by me as I was always confident and always knew exactly what I wanted, what I was doing etc.

- When I went to college and through later years I learned to kind of turn-off my bright aura that made people always notice me in a room. I’m happier now that I don’t always stand out. I’ll always be a unique person and I’ll always have people jealous of me (that sounds so big-headed but it is true lol) it’s just now I can walk into a room without everyone looking at me, and now I can meet new people without them thinking I’m a show off or anything..

Stand out. I hate people who act like everyone else, because they can’t act like themselves.

true shxt!

I mean you dont gotta stand outt like make yourself look like some crazy freak or some shxt like that just be you just be real.

Blend in. It’s just natural for me. I don’t have anything to prove, so I’m not gonna go out of my way to act like something I’m not. I stand out amongst my group of friends, which is all that really matters to me.

Stand out obviously if my hair is purple haha

Stand out. I’d rather be me and be hated for it than be liked for lying.

Either.

I don’t particularly prefer one over the other. I figure I’m not ALWAYS going to stand out or ALWAYS blend in. Each circumstance is different. I just try my best to respect those around me, and make the best of each situation. As far as work is concerned, I do my job and try my best to convey that I am an asset. When it came to school, I studied and preformed well as a student. When it comes to friends, it doesn’t matter if I stand out OR blend in because true friends will enjoy my company either way.

its better to stay true to yourself because it you try tto blend in to the group you gain there behabiour habits and not all ar good and by the time you realise that the friendship is wrong for you you realise tthat you’ve become just like them and you feel ashaamed and when it comes to the point were you want to leave it will be harder for you than the group

its better to stay true to yourself because it you try tto blend in to the group you gain there behabiour habits and not all ar good and by the time you realise that the friendship is wrong for you you realise tthat you’ve become just like them and you feel ashaamed and when it comes to the point were you want to leave it will be harder for you than the group

I’ll write my bottom line first since my post is rather lengthy. Bottom line is, its not always bad to blend in. Many of us feel the need to stand out at some point or another. I venture to say that the desire to stand out all the time can be chalked up to teenage narcissism.

I think it’s worth keeping in mind that it can be just as easy to lose yourself trying to stand out. It is nice to think that we are all so very unique with much to offer the world. It’s nice to think that each of us deserves being the center of attention because we are such amazing and beautiful people, inside and out. The reality is that there just isn’t that much of a variation within a specific culture for every single person to stand out. There must be a common ground for people to be able to forge relationships with one another. People tend to gravitate toward those who are like minded in many ways. You will most likely not stand out from 100% of your peers. Trying to stand out could leave people wondering what the “real you” is like under that thick layer of effort. Sometimes posers really are as annoying as you think. Everyone shutters at the possibility of being called a poser, but if you’re trying too hard to stand out, then you are a poser.

Of course there are those few people who do stand out wherever they go. But that may not always be what its cracked up to be. Some people have very high IQs that leave peers jealous. Some people have mental disorders that keep them from recognizing social cues, causing them to be left out in many instances. Having the ability to blend in is a luxury some kids don’t have. Many children with genetic disorders that manifest as physical anomalies would give anything to fit in. Some people are ostracized their entire lives for their appearance, or mental capacity which they have no control over.

The desire to stand out should be very situational. If you want a promotion, then you most certainly should do your best to stand out. If you’re driving down the highway, chances are you should try to blend in amongst your driving peers. Going to a Halloween party? By all means stand out! If you find yourself in an unfamiliar neighborhood by yourself at night, I’m sure you’d probably opt for the option to blend in.

Disclaimer: I think teenage narcissism can be a useful tool in developing self confidence and self worth. Although the word narcissism often carries a negative connotation, I don’t mean it in a negative way.

Very well said and I agree about the true friends

Thank you!

For the most part I prefer to blend in. I don’t like large groups of people and I really don’t like standing out in them. I really only like to socialize in a 1-on-1 sort of way. If I know all the people there REALLY well and/or if I’m very confident about what I’m talking about small groups of people don’t bother me too much.

The key phrase in this question is “with your peers.” Blending in with one group - the one you identify with, or have most in common with, or whose style suits yours, or for whatever reason - will make you stand out from other groups. This is true for all sorts of groups. For example, the twists and turns of my life have led me to identify both as a progressive-countercultural boomer (see my profile) and as a religious Jew (most people would say “Orthodox,” though I’m not fond of that word) - even though many members of these two distinctive subcultural groups would consider them to be at odds with each other. The way I dress and present myself tends to straddle the line between them. So whichever of the two communities I find myself with, I blend in somewhat, and stand out somewhat. Whether people see me as “one of us” or as an outsider depends on what they focus on and how rigid or flexible their criteria are. People with no connection to or first-hand knowledge of either community often just think I look odd - in some places I get a lot of stares, lol. This is reasonably reflective of my more-or-less unconscious preference (which I recognize from the consistency of my behavior in this regard since childhood): On the one hand, I want to stand out, to confound set categories and expectations, to not only retain my idiosyncratic ways of perceiving, thinking, and being, but to let them be known. On the other hand, I nevertheless want to be accepted for who I am. That’s not too much to ask, right? It’s a balancing act.