Am I hip or old?

My son is 16. He says I am old because im not into the younger kids style, and I act like a parent. He would rather talk to a friend than me because parents just don’t understand. I just want the best for them so I have a postive, respectful appearance. I am 38. Am I old and too, old fashion? Or am I doing what other parents do? Should I be more lay back with my kids? I don’t know

Answer #1

haha no way

im 13 and my dads 54 lol

ummm I guess what you could do is yeah kinda lay back ummm the thing we really hate is that when you guys say go clean your room or something but what you guys dont know is that eventually we get sick of it and clean it anywanys lol if he askes for something and if it doesnt cost a lot of money or time but it would be fun …let him beacuse the longer there away the more they will want to schedule things with you like movie night or go out to eat or somewthing lol I do that to my mom all the time and what my mom does is shell usually say yes and if I get in trouble or about to get in trouble she lets it happen because you may not think it but we are learning a lesson if you guys are fighting dont intrupt listen to what they have to say

but if he really can t go some were he wants dont ever say no I dont think it going to work out this time…that bugs us so much lol say it in a way like hmmm no how about next weekend and then keep reminding them through out the week soi that they know that you really do think about them and what they do

hehe hope I helped lol dont worry my moms not hip but I still love her!:)

Answer #2

you know I am 17 and my parents are 35 and 36 and they used to think the same thing (yup your doing what most parents do and there is NOTHING wrong with it))I grew out of it pretty much but ummm it never realy goes a way he will probably still want to go to his friends more often then you but its normal but dont try and force your self on him give him just a little bit of room to breath but still maintain a part of his life and may be it would help you bond a little more and maybe you should give his opinions a shot just to see if you and him have a better prospective of things and see where he is coming from then maybe,just maybe he might open up to you more rather than a friend…relaxs a little more but DO NOT let them over run you… I know you probably dont want a teens prospective but im telling you the truth and I hope that I help a bit :)

Answer #3

You’re definitely not old! It’s never “cool” for a teenager to talk to their parents, it’s “cool” to rebel against them. If I my parents had a dollar for all the baloney I put them through, all the times I shut them out because I didn’t want to talk to them since they didn’t “understand”- they’d be millionares. My brothers and I are all in our mid to late 20’s and we’re closer to our parents than ever. Why? Because we’ve been out there in the world, we’ve put the lessons our parents have taught us to use. Whether we showed them when we were teenagers that we were listening or not, we still absorbed what they told us. We’ve had to think for ourselves, support ourselves, live like adults. And speaking for myself, I appreciate my parents more than ever. Sure there’s things that we’ve done that they don’t quite get why we did them, there’s things now they don’t get! But that’s just the way is. You aren’t old fashioned, it’s just being a teenager now is much different than when my parents, you (the original poster) or any kids who’ve posted responses saying that they are 13/14 were teenagers. When push comes to shove your son will come to you for help, because he can’t rely on his friends advice for situations that they may know nothing about, and he can’t rely on their advice forever. Perhaps you should just in a very casual way let him know that even if he thinks you don’t understand what it means to be a teenager now, you are willing to try to understand. Maybe take him out to do something that he enjoys, like for example, let’s say he likes paintball- take out for a game and connect. Sure he might think it’s not cool on the outside, but inside it has to strike him that you are trying to understand him and his interests better.

It can’t hurt to try, if it doesn’t work, just ride it out- he’ll come around. Good luck!

Answer #4

First of all, you should ask your son if he would like to see you in a mini-skirt? After he says NO, tell him to appreciate it that he has a conservative Mother. Kids find it uncool if their parents “try” to talk like them or use their slang words because it just doesn’t come out right. Just be you.

It’s natural for teens to think that they need their friends more than their family but they don’t know the difference between need and want yet. They want friends, they need their parents. It’s hard to know that your little angel is growing up and isn’t sharing everything with you anymore but you are an expert at giving them what they need. Every Mother is. He needs a parent. Just give him space and room to grow up. Accept the he has a little life that doesn’t include you anymore and let him live and learn. The more parents try to prevent their teens from making mistakes, the more their teens pull away.

Let him go through this phase. Let him know that you’re there for him but don’t get into his every business. It’s normal for him to be closer to his friends for now but he’ll grow up to realize that only you provide the unconditional love that cannot be replaced. Spending time with your teen is very important. Lecturing time is not considered spending time to him. Know when it’s not big enough for you to step in and know when it’s time for you to step in. Teens needs guidance though they don’t see it.

I plan to have kids but I do dread going through those years with them. I took care of my teen sister for 2 years and it was one heck of a challenge for me. Good luck and hope I helped a little.

Answer #5

When I was pregnant, a good friend told me that every question reguarding my child could be answer best with “how can I love him/her best?”.

Answer #6

u should just give your kid space and let them come to you if you yell at them or ask them if something is wrong they will think you are out to get them ven though your not. be sure to tell them they can come to you with anything but dont pressure them

Answer #7

Take it from a “child” perspective, if my parents were cool and had friendly convos with me without getting too personal because then we willt hink you are invading our space and being spies…you should let him do stuff but not too wild.!! be your ideal parent when you were his age!

Answer #8

I am 13 and my dad is 51 and I don’t talk to him at all anymore mostly because he truly doesn’t care but you seem like a good parent so you should just calmly let your son know that he can talk to you and you should promise him you will be understanding and wont get mad at him with out seeing thing in his point of view first good luck

Answer #9

Lay back more. Its better for the kid.

Answer #10

Yuur defo not old im 14 and my parents are both 45… if yuur son doesnt talk to yuu much well just let him come to yuu.

Answer #11

I’m 13 and my parents are 43 and 45 and I think my friends understand more becouse they do

Answer #12

I mean because

Answer #13

I am a guy : )

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