When Does "discipline" go too far?

you should never hit a child ost children need support today. why would yiou have to hit a child.to refrain a child from hurting you or themseleves tskes effort mentaly a professional person should always be there to help in those situation that is not to get to the point of dischapter

If the parent strikes the child on purpose with any physical object - belt, switch, whip, etc - it is abusive. Or a fist. Not a single open-handed swat to the bottom.

That’s my opinion.

Corporal punishment has been around forever, considering most of the population is not crazy, or homocidal, I dont think it did that much harm.

It turns into abuse when kids actually have lasting bruises or other injuries, more than a couple of mins…

This whole debate is ridiculous, there is nothing wrong with a slap or a smack on the bottom, and sometimes it is necessary, it is not always that the parent is just frustrated, but sometimes kids need to remember certain lessons (like dont run across the street)

Dear wonderpetsrule, Anything other then a light tap to the bottom is now considered abuse. You cannot leave any mark on a child, even with the slap to the bottom. This is what the law determines. As workers we frown on even the slap to the bottom. This shows a lack of coping skills from the adults. There is never a time when a bigger person because of frustration or anger should touch a child…this is considered bullying. Now you know why we have so many bullies today. Sue…good luck

Four categories of abuse are briefly defined:

* Physical Abuse - Any non-accidental, out-of-control injury.
* Sexual Abuse - Any sexual act between adult and child.
* Neglect - Failure to provide for the child's physical needs.
* Emotional Abuse - Any attitude or behavior interfering with a child's
   mental or social development, including lack of love.

If you want to read more about it: http://www.allaboutparenting.org/child-abuse-vs-discipline-faq.htm

Well I guess it really matters who does it! Like if he hits too hard then he should stop!

If its constant and for mo apparent good reason then it is considered abuse. In my opinion however, I think that any physical punishment is wrong. But for the sake of your question, anything that leaves a mark or is anything more than a light spank or tap should be considered abuse and whoever it is involving should talk to someone. Good luck.

I know corporal punishment against children was common in the 19th century, but if people want society to travel forwards, change is sometimes needed. I hope all countries have banned spanking children within at least 20 years.

I still recall how I some years ago, saw a long newspaper article about a little girl (can’t recall country, it was a Western one) who was spanked som years ago, but not physical abused, for a lot of things (like just forgetting a blouse button, talking in a way her mother considered wrong, asking why some rules were like they were or sometimes doing bad grades at school even when doing the homework). She was an upper class girl with a very strict mother with very restricted ideas about how to raise a girl. She was always told exactly what to do, what to wear and how to appear (all those rules weren’t bad, but some were way too strict, children need to be children too). Maybe she became a more obedient girl, but she was so afraid of doing anything. Her mother siad her daughter was very disobiedient, but she wasn’t. She just did the best she could, and the rules were very strict making the daughter feel herself guilty, creating a big pressure (she did some major rule-breakings sometimes, but not much).

One day when she was 12 she threw herself down to the floor in the house, and begun to cry for hours when nothing had happened. Her mother became worried and asked what was wrong. She asked her daughter if it was something that hurted. “-Not physical!” the girl shouted (which maybe is deep for a 12 year old) and continued to cry.

Then the girl didn’t say anything, but then she said it was all these years of spankings that were to ruin her childhood. Her mother first thought it was some trick and was about to spank her again for tricking, until she looked and she could see the fear in her helpless little daughters eyes.

Instead, she begun to think of the words her daughter said, and she comforted her daughter and now understood it was not good to spank, even if it was not so much it gave physical injuries. They cried together that evening.

From that day, she remained strict to her daughter but stopped using all cruel punushment methods like spanking. Instead, she talked a lot more to her daughter about the rules and asked about her feelings, told how much she loved her, and only kept some other punishments, like sending the girl to her room or banning her from going out on evenings. It actually showed that the daughter needed comfort and care, not spankings.