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opinions on my poem
heres my poem about a homeless perosn How can I help you out of the dark and into the light? I take pity, feel guilty. Strangers c you busking, little do they know. Fighting to survive, Dying inside, lost hope and prosperity in life. I see you standing, Watching. Waiting. Engaged to the pavements, lonely has a new meaning to u, Nobody takes the time to witness the pain and torture in your eyes, I do. Let me help u. let me listen. Engage me with your stories and wisdom. Stranger I can’t stop the poison injected, the venom surges through your veins. Let me cure you with new hopes and revelations, dreams and affection. Don’t scar your future, let the wounds heal. Wilfully take the hand of the enthusiast, Open a utopia to create perfection. Rebuild the foundations of your life.
It was REALLY amazing- I keep a journal and write donw my fav. poems and qoutes and stuffs.. this is totally something id put in my journal to remember- it has such a great meaning! and based on real life of how usually peopel treat the homeless. your seriusly good try doin more hah =]
* Kitty!*
That poem is BRILLIANT. I also read the poem on your profile page and it’s really really really good aswell. You should become a professional poet or an author or something.
I think that you did a very good job on this poem, you convey the idea behind the poem very well. My only suggestion would be to fix the all of the u’s you have there to “you”. Also, the “c” to “see”. Other than that, it’s fantastic.
awww thanks that means a lot
I think its amazing!
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