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How to help a friend who self-harms?

2day when I was at school I found out that one of my close friends has bin selfharming and hes even tried to kill themselves. She has sed to another friend I will kill myself 2nite, the school were told and she had to leave school to go for counciling. I am really worried about her, this is all so sudden, what can I do to her help her? Is it my fault?

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Answer #1

no it isnt your fault. she hurts herself because she’s in a lot of pain, and there’s a lot of reasons people cut (to feel, to stop feeling, to be in control, to punish themselves etc etc). She uses it as a coping method because she cant cope with whatever she’s going through in any other way. She got to a point where she felt nothing would help and she couldnt cope any more and so she tried to kill herself. You are already being a good friend, you care about her, you are concerned, and that is all she needs right now. Someone who cares and someone who is concerned. Dont make this about you. Guilt is the last thing she needs. Just be there. Try not to judge her. I hope everything works out ok. She’s getting the help she needs, she will probably be ok.

Answer #2

Self-injury is usually not suicidal behavior but rather a way to reduce tensions. Inflicting physical harm on oneself is a poorly learned coping mechanism which is used to communicate feelings and self-soothe. Self-injury is strongly linked to a poor sense of self-worth, and over time, that depressed feeling can spiral into a suicidal attempt. Sometimes self-harm may accidentally go farther than intended, and a life-threatening injury may result which is why intervention and professional help is required sooner rather than later: http://www.helpguide.org/mental/self_injury.htm

You’re a good friend - I wish you every success !!

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