My step son and his father want to see more of each other,help?

My step son is 12.he is a real credit to us.he lives with his mother not far away.both parents have joint custody,but she is an absolute nightmare for keep changing her mind when we can have him.my husband and stepson are so bonded,its breaking there hearts not to see each other more. He loves his mother to pieces, but gets so frustrated that she wont allow him to see more of dad.he tells us this “ I ask to see dad all the time,but she just says things like’ you dont love me anymore’” he doesnt want to feel like hes letting his mother down, but wants more time here as well.we’ve just found out this week also,we cant have him on christmas day.its breaking all our hearts ,and we feal totally useless to do anything. We pay maintainence ,and at the moment have him every other fri & sat.during school holidays,even when shes working and his dad isnt, she says he cant have him. We are so lost and frustrated,if my step son was happy,maybe we could brush it aside,but hes hurting too.is it worth seing a solicitor,and setting something in stone?

Answer #1

Thanks for your advice all. we managed to make the best of our christmas and new year, and I hope you all had a good one. This year for us will mean solicitor action,it is unfortunate, but we have callums best interests at heart.

have a good 2009 !!!

Answer #2

My son is the same age and I have the SAME problem. Mine got better when my-ex just couldn’t get along with him. Sounds like it’s all about her, and doesn’t sound like that’s going to change. It’s a pity that people put their selfish needs before their child’s.

It looks like you need to start building ammo and take it to court. He’s 12 the judge will listen to him.

Answer #3

You need to see a solicitor and get in writing when he can see him. If she then breaks the “visitation” schedule she could be held in contempt of court (meaning she could end up in jail). My husband’s ex wife did the same thing with their two boys only she turned the boys against their father (they were only 8 & 6 at the time). My husband also had a very hard time with this but after taking her to court and her being told she would go to jail she finally let him see them. But the damage was already done and they would cry every time they came over. Have your husband do what he has to so that his son knows that he’s there for him…it will be hard but in the end it will be worth it :)

Answer #4

I agree… take legal action!

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