in love with another man but dont want to hurt the kids!

I do really love my boyfriend but I dont feel truly happy with him

wow I’m so sorry, it must suck your lfe is pretty Complicated. I feel sorry for you. If the kids are young, they won’t really understand if you leave and be wtb the one you truly love! And since that a$$&@hole that you love won’t leave his girlfriend he’s just using you for someone else to have, his words are fake and he’s all lies! That’s what I think, anyways the guy your with seems very nice e loves you! Learn to love him,

thanks a lot, that really gives me a different look at the situation, but the hard thing is that the other man is kind of a family friend, and sometimes I cant avoid him. and the kids are 10 and 12.

I understand it may not seem fair to the kids, but they are young, they wont understand whats going on, and hopefully time will heal them over.

As for you, you shouldn’t be in a relationship that makes you feel trapped. You should be in a relationship if you’re not happy with the other person. You’re not married to this guy, so leaving wont be as tough as one through a divorce, although it is still painful for sure. It’s only fair for the other person, that you are there because you want to, and that you’re happy in the relationship. If not, it’s better to do him a favor in the long run by doing the right thing and leaving, and be honest to him about why you are doing so.

HOWEVER, feelings can change, can’t they? Maybe you just need to spend more time with your boyfriend and do the things you two did when you first started dating. Get the fun back into the relationship. Rekindle some of that passion. Like all broken marriages and relationships, they can be fixed, if the couple is wiling to put a lot of work into it. It is possible. Talk to your boyfriend, and tell him that you want to inject some new excitement into the relationship, and get him to suggest some fun things to do, and you two can brainstorm stuff you can do to keep the passion alive. Sharing and going through the ideas that you two thought up will help in the relationship, it will make both people feel like they have contributed to the growing joy back in the relationship.

You’ve been with your boyfriend for almost 6 years, it’s normal to feel like the relationship is slowing down and maybe going nowhere. But as I said, sometimes we forget that RELATIONSHIPS NEED HARD WORK. You’re so tempted with the other relationship because it’s newer, fresher, there’s things you haven’t discovered yet together, and the sex is still exciting, or at least newer than your main relationship. An affair seems exciting because it’s also not allowed, it’s something naughty to do. Remember when we were teenagers, that we’d do some naughty things sometimes just because it’s not allowed/taboo? We get an adrenaline rush out of it. But now that we’re older, we know not to do it, because we have to deal with the consequences of it now, and haven’t we got a huge problem now?

I think you should concentrate on your current relationship, and enjoy nurturing the children and watch them grow. This other man should be ignored from now on. He is trouble for you. He has a girlfriend who gave him another chance, and he still went to betray her trust by coming back to you to tell you that he loves you. Obviously, he will have to sort his sh|t out himself. And he will have a lot of it, especially since he has children with his girlfriend. He has to be off limits now, because he’s going to cause his family more turmoil, sooner or later.

Don’t prove that the phrase “once a cheater, always a cheater” is right. Prove that you’ve stronger and better than that. Good luck.