Is the message clear in this poem?

I just wrote this today during a study hall, and I wanted to know if anyone could interpret it, just to see if I got my point across, to see if the message is clear.

The unresting shivers of the midnight air shroud my thoughts with the presence of a stare

The stare that strains, that penetrates, that invites my eyes to the ever shining moonlight that fills my head with lies

The lies that thrill, joy, and love will come with what the moonlight brings for what it hides is what the shiver’s source sings

Answer #1

Great job, and yes it gets out the point! To me at least!

Answer #2

I apologize zach. I was being a smart alec. at the time, I happened to think your abrupt way of saying wrong was a little condescending. However I have since realized that you were probably just being silly and I have terrible PMS. I am sorry for being a b*tch. Keep on writing buddy. It’s good for the soul. Forgive me for loosing my head. Pals?

Answer #3

The poem was really strong but I only see some similies to your message, And people have different souls, so they tend to things differently! Dont get mad at them because you message doesnt POP! I know because I am a poetry writer as well! Their your words use them wisely!

Answer #4

jeez, we got some smarta$s people on here…

I guess the message isn’t

It’s about hating winter. About looking forward to it, and then when it comes, completely dissappoints, not because of the cold or snow, but the fear of life changes, and of other aspects of life that aren’t particularly favorable, and they just happen to be during the season I thought changes would happen for the better.

Answer #5

buzz sound wrong

Answer #6

Well there is obviously someone who captivates you, who shouldn’t.

Answer #7

Please enlighten me, you genious poet you.

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