Which direction do I choose for my life?

hi im a 27yr old single mom of 2, i am a work aholic just to provide for my kids and i do well im going to go back to school purchasing my first home all on my own. i dont have much time for relationships, so i began a casual encounter about a lil longer than two years ago, i didnt expect much from the relation ship other than companionship thats all really he could offer, we mutually respected eachother so there was no sleeping around while with each other, given we did take breaks for a month or so, then decided we wanted to be with only each other, him feeling incompitent makes it difficult to be with me the bread winner, but dosent bother me as long as there is want and effort put fourth, i also have a fear of commitment i push away because i truly want you to show me you want to be there i guess i see it if its that easy for you to go you never really wanted to be there, well when ii decided that it reeally wasent going to work for real this time and we split 2 weeks later i find my self pregnant! we decide to make it work he says he wants to be there and straighten his life out but then feels inferior and dosent come home for 3 days explains himself but i refuse to believe he is tellng me the truth. so i ask him to stay gone now im going to be a single mom for the third time over i was going to get an abortion, im 9 weeks pregnant but i just couldnt do it,im very spiritual i was on birth controll pills and believe things happen because they are supposed to i ask people for advise some tell me im makink a huge mistake it isnt fair to my children im gonna be alone and make me cry others say the opposite im not going to say it has been easy raising my children alone and its not something id particularly like to go thru from the start again, i just couldnt terminate it am i wrong? what should i do? and adoption is not a consideration, the child would not suffer by my hand in upbringing only my life and emotions i would very mich like to hear your OPPINIONS THANKS