No "I love you" after 9 months...

I’ve been with my boyfriend for 9 months and for the first 7 months everything was absolutely perfect. Then his twin sister started hating me and he was under a lot of pressure to break it off with me. He grew distant and I asked him to please decide if he wanted to stay with me and deal with the pressure from his family or break it off. He decided that he wanted to stay with me, which I was thrilled about. The problem is that he’s never said that he loves me. He’s told me that it’s “more than like” and when he writes me letters or cards he always signs it with love or lots of love. I really do feel loved and I love him with every cell in my body but I’m not saying it first. The only other serious boyfriend that I’ve had… I told him that I loved him and he never replied… So I’m not going through that again. What should I do? I was sure that he must love me to put up with all the pressure that his parents and sister are putting him through… Why else would he do that to himself? And if so, why hasn’t he said it? The only other relationship that he’s been in was in first year university and school which lasted 2 years but he’s told me that what they had was no where near what we have, and I know he’s never told anyone that he loves them.

Answer #1

Not much advice that I would be able to give you on this… But I would say that if this goes on for about a month, I think that your dating the wrong guy. If you want the answer as soon as possible if you meet up with him and hug him or something, try asking ‘Do you love me?’ or something along those lines. Basically try to see him as soon as possible and ask him the question. If you don’t want to do that you can keep waiting. Hope This Helps

Answer #2

guys can be cold hearted - and it may not be that he doesnt like/love you… its just he is still in his macho mode. he may have been hurt by a woman before in his past, and finds it harder to open out again… he may very well love you but also knowing the old saying ‘treat a woman mean,keep her keen’ basically - by not telling you he always keeps you on your toes…

if you want my advice, and really want to hear him say it, or give him the test.. then i would say turn DOWN the heat, and tell him you dont want to see him for a few weeks… you have some things you gotta do… tell him you will contact him when your free again… then let it cool down…

this will either confuse the hell out of him, and he will wonder what hes done wrong. He may start getting romantic, and then gesturing his true feelings once you have both had some time apart.. absence makes the heart grow stronger - so use it in your favour…

or worst case scenario, he really is a stone cold lover, and wont react… in which case…yep, he is using you..and you deserve better… use the trial separation as basis for a permanent split - and move on…

best of luck… we’ve all been there - you get through it.. dont worry… life’s a game, don’t take things too seriously…

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