How do I tell my parents I was raped?

its not yur fault at all so why shud you be ashamed of what some creep did to u. I no people you were raped and they went to counsiling and stuf . now they cane talk bout it without crying. the first step is to let yur loved ones no.

ya they might, cause she didn’t tell them from the begenning, and they will also be proud, I dunno how, but it’s just a whole mixed up feeling that my parents usually get when they see my brother’s report card so all I’d say is… … … good luck :) and smile, don’t worry, everything will be ok, just don’t be scared to tell ‘em..

You could always leave a note to your mom, you could write something like this: Mom, I need to talk to you about rape. This way she will bring it up and you won’t have to. Just put it somewhere where she will find it and the subject will be more comfortable to talk about.

I am terribly sad this happened to you. Please tell your parents, or a teacher you trust, or anyone for that matter, but I would tell your parents. Maybe start with the one you feel most comfortable with. There is nothing you did, EVER, that has made this your fault. Who cares if you didn’t report it right away. Many grown women don’t report rape right away. Please talk to someone about this. My thoughts are with you…

Now for a special note to andyburton- I have read two answers from you regarding rape/abuse of a female child. In the first you answered that it was somehow her fault that he dad beats her, in this, you stated that she was probably not raped and she shouldn’t “cry wolf”… You should NOT inflict your level of judgmental cruelty on these questions. You do not seem to understand that IT IS NOT THE VICTIM’S FAULT>>> EVER!!! To dismiss what she knows was rape because you are uneducated/uninformed/crazy, whatever you excuse is, is not something you should be spreading. She is a young, scared girl reaching out for support and she gets nothing from you except that it probably didn’t happen and you better be careful before you accuse someone. “To rape an eight year old probably does not involve intercourse” What are you even talking about? Do you even know? Yes, raping an 8 year old involves intercourse, just as it can with a 3 year old. And I agree with ty…ANYTHING sexual that someone does to a child is sick and that person needs to held accountable.

I got raped when I was 9 and I didnt tell noone im now 18 but I finally told my parents when I was 16 and not saying anything was the worst thing I couldve done I knew who raped me it was my sisters dad. if you know who done then you should tell someone as it will affect your later life like it has me I am now having to have counselling and im on antidepressants all because of this one person and because I didnt say anything I bottled it up. SO PLEASE TELL SOMEONE

When I was younger I got raped. I thought I deserved it because I went with some of my friends to a hotel party, they were both older than me so I thought they who protect me. Well we were all going to go swimming I was the last one to get ready and this guy came back “for his cell phone” and raped me. The next day he left because he got out of base training. The only thing that could make me feel better is knowing he got in trouble for what he did to me. I will NEVER have that chance, but you do. Think about that does he deserve freedom to do that to any other girls? And Chick you need to go the doctor, because the are bad things that he could have given you. So you should tell someone whether it be a best friend that can help, a parent, a teacher, or a doctor you just need to let someone know. You owe it to yourself. It will be hard at first but you’ll feel better after you can get help. I hope everything works out for you, I know it’s hard, but everything works out for the best.

the same happened it my friend illchelsea please chat to her

andyburton - what would you know about whether raping an 8 year old involves intercourse or not? and whether it involved intercourse, or was assault, it is not any different, touching a child is SICK! He needs to be locked up and never see the light of day again!

Tell your parents. I know it can be hard, but they will be able to get you help.

There’s this hotline you can either call, 1 800 656 HOPE or you can chat to someone online http://apps.rainn.org/ohl-bridge/

This is their website. http://www.rainn.org/ Please talk to someone there.

I’m so sorry!! you really need to tell your parents for what this guy who is sick in the head and should go straight to prison and never come out. Forgive me lord!! but, this guy should go to prison and die!! to rape a child like that, that’s sick and very perverted and wrong!! I know your parents will be so proud that you will be honest and straight forward with them. I know a friend of mine who was molested and raped when she was three and six. Her ex husband pretty much abused her and raped her since she wasn’t the one that wanted to have a loving relationship or marriage with him since he was a alcoholic and went out with allot of women. Her second husband who passed away was more loving to her and, she still thinks of him. At age 21 I think she said, she was raped by three other guys and, her life was not so good. She told me at first, she was afraid to tell her aunts who raised her that she was molested and raped as a child. But, eventually, she had to tell. This guy that raped you when you were 8, that’s sick like I said, and very cruel. Just to be safe, please tell your parents and, they’ll take care of it by getting the police involved and, they can get this sick and perverted person locked up and maybe he’ll die and once he gets into heaven, he’ll have to repent of this serious sin. Your in my thoughts and prayers and, if this comes back to haunt you which it seems like, then I would also recomend counseling to get this out in the open. Good luck, and, be sure to get this out to your parents since its not good to keep these things inside of you.

imme’s answer is totally dumb. no offence. I’ve been through this. when I was eight I was molested by my uncle. telling the police, will get him arrested for a day or two (put onto his record) of course you have to tell your parents, as you should have from the start. when it happened to me, I ran to my dad, I ran away from my uncle to tell my dad. Parents knowing is what’s best. Just explain to them that, you felt uncomfortable with the situation, and that you felt weird about telling them. On top of that you are scared. If the man who raped you is still in your life, tell them that you dont feel comfortable with him being around you. That you’re scared he might do it again. Then, your parents should take you to the DA (district attorney) they’re stupid too, but it will get you a court case, so you can put the man in jail if he pleads guilty. the district attorney will ask you what happens, and you have to explain everything truthfully, don’t change it around, because you’re going to court with that case. That should help! also, if you still feel weird about what happened, ask your parents to take you too counseling. I was only 8 so, my parents took me. and now, I barely remember that the situation took place. It may not work for everyone! but an attempt won’t kill anyone! Good luck telling your parents, I hope I helped.

ummm, why do you want to tell ‘em? do you still know the person who raped you? why didn’t you tell ‘em from the begenning? and if you don’t want them to know, then just don’t tell ‘em, but if the guy who raped you is still around and you’re worried about that he might rape you again, then you should tell ‘em and tell the police too!! OR, you can just tell the policemen, and they will put him in jail, you don’t have to tell your parents, just do everything yourself!

but it’s better if you tell your parents and they take care of everything, by the way, the only way that makes them believe is to swear, I know we shouldn’t swear a lot, but this time you have to!!! and tell them to promise you to take everything easy and not to get mad or disapointed… (tell them to swear if you had to) then feel free to say everything on your mind!! you can just tell one of them (the one you love the most) good luck :)

yes

I got raped when I was 9 and I didnt tell noone im now 18 but I finally told my parents when I was 16 and not saying anything was the worst thing I couldve done I knew who raped me it was my sisters dad. if you know who done then you should tell someone as it will affect your later life like it has me I am now having to have counselling and im on antidepressants all because of this one person and because I didnt say anything I bottled it up. SO PLEASE TELL SOMEONE

Gargoyle, the age of the rapist shouldn’t be a factor in deciding whether or not it is a good idea to tell someone. andyburton came off as a total creep to me. I got major pedophile vibes from the way he commented young girls pics before even seeing this thread. If you know him personally, you may want to either watch your younger sisters and daughters around him, or give him heads up that he’s coming off as a preditor. Or maybe you can give your female loved ones a pen to guard themselves in case they fear being “tackled”. SICK!

you have to tell them. sit them down and let them know that you want to tell them something serious. I know you don’t want to tell them because you might feel awkward and ashamed, but your parents are there to help and support you, not to judge you. they are not going to think any less of you, and they are not going to be disappointed..

they’re going to be proud of you for being strong enough to tell them… then they’re going to help and defend you.

you know the right thing to do.

Way to go lizzie. Both ARE wrong either way!

it will be really hard to say something but living in silence is way worst

First of all, congratulations on seeking help. It’s a very scary and confusing time. You need to tell them… for yourself and for anyone else he might have hurt or could potentially hurt.

I was raped and sexually abused for most of my life and I stayed silent until I was 19. Yes it’s scary, yes it’s embaressing - but guess what? You survived this, you’re strong and you’re so brave. You did nothing wrong and it’s not your fault.

After I told, I found out there were other girls from his previous marriage that were raped and sexually abused. They never told. They could have prevented it from happening and he could have got what he deserved a while ago… but it took 25 + years until I came out with it!

It’s very hard to go through this alone. Please find a counselor in your area that can help. Here is your local crisis center: http://www.lighthousehelp.com/rapecrisis.htm

There are also some good books to help you (and your closest friends and family heal) This can be very hard on parents who will often blame themselves for it happening. For You: The Courage to Heal The Right to Innocence

For them: Survivors and Partners: Healing the relationships of Sexual Abuse survivors

Also if you need to talk to someone via phone or messenger please visit rainn.com

And if you need another survivor to talk to feel free to funmail me or send me a message on myspace.

xox Sika