Funadvice Logo
Post
More Art, Writing & Literature Questions

My poem

Ok dis is 1 of my poems but in my head I tink I can make it bttr and well people on here can b harsh but honest so what do you tink bout it?

Her whisper was like a summers bereeze in the darkness to me, an when she sneezed it was like when the sea tries to grow legs and walk on land with the sweetest smell that I have ever smelled I stand not knowing up or dwn I just hear these sounds beating on my tempanic membranes, synapses fireing all at the same time telling my mind that I need to find this sound for it might be the only light in my darkness, I run don’t no what direction if I am running at all I know is I am going to find this light, what fells like eons later I see something I run towards it an as I get closer my smile begins to fade for it is no light to my darkness, just another door way that says exit, to another darkhallway

Become an Expert →
Answer #1

helll amazing! its good so poems dont always need to rythm?? I thought it did lol oh well I learned sumthin today hah

Answer #2

wow I like this poem good job!!!

More Like This
Ask an advisor one-on-one!
Advisor

Poems Please

Literature, Arts & Humanities, Education

Advisor

Diamond Nail Supplies

Nail Supplies, Beauty Essentials, Salon Equipment

Advisor

Shopnobilap

Literature, Online Publishing, Community

Advisor

Silverhints

Poetry, Shayari, Ghazal