How do i help my friend out?

Well, I’ve smoked weed myself and done it quite often. I still smoke, though not very much anymore. By itself its really not anything to worry about, but combined with drinking and heavy partying its very likely she’s losing herself in the swirl of narcotic bliss that we call the party world. If you’re just now going into highschool she is WAY too young to be doing anything short of fun little supervised parties…

Drugs, Alcohol and Partying aside, you will start to notice that she’s not the only one that has begun to change. I don’t want to piss you off or scare you by saying this, but most of the friends you have now won’t be your friends (or at least not as good friends) by the time highschool ends. You, her and everyone else you know is going to grow older and turn into the person they want to be in life. The thing that sucks about that is not everybody is going to want to be a sweet, friendly, fun, positive thinker. Even with that, they may also simply make bad decisions and turn themselves into someone they originally never wanted to be.

I know I’ve been struggling since about 21 years old to become that person I wanted to be when I was 10 years old. I veared off the path I had laid out for myself and though I’m getting there, I’m still not as good a person as I’d like to have been by this point.

That should help you understand her a bit better, but as far as helping her goes, you are really limited on your choices because any psychologist can tell you if someone doesn’t WANT to change, then it won’t happen, no matter what they say or do. Despite her being FAR too young to be off partying, she wants that world for herself and is probably willing to risk your friendship and her own happiness to keep doing what she’s doing.

If you want to be a good friend to, tell her that you think her party lifestyle is wrecking the good girl you used to know. Tell her that you feel like you’re losing your best friend to drugs and alcohol. Tell her that you miss her smile. (Its very possible, at this point, that she feels like she can’t smile unless she’s drunk or high - maybe both.) Just love her with everything you have and don’t be surprised when she rejects you. Actually, expect her to reject you so you can let her know that you love her anyway; that you’ll love her no matter what. If she rejected you, then she will probably ignore you, but in her heart she will hear you and though things may seem to get worse between you both, eventually they will get better.

Keep faith in yourself and don’t give in to her if she tries to convince you that the world she is living in is better than yours. You may decide to try drugs and alcohol later on life, but that is SO stupid to do before your body has developed completely.

You’re a very faithful friend and as long as you stick to your beliefs and be true to who you are you’ll eventually turn her. Just be real with yourself and realize that in the end the most important thing is taking care of your own well-being. Don’t risk everything trying to save her and lose yourself in the process. Good luck, sweetie.