Fixing a relationship?

Hello there, so i need some help here, so i’ve been dating this wonderful girl for 10 months now and everything was good until about 2 months ago, we both would get in arguments/fights for foolish reasons but we would make up like the next week or so and these would keep going on for quite some time, and one night i messed things up pretty bad but i sent her an email over night and she forgave me the next morning and things were perfect after that until anout the 2 week of June, she was about to go on vacation on a Friday and somedays i would ask her if she would like to talk on the phone and sometimes she could and alot of times she couldn’t and on that Friday before she left we got in a big fight and she feels that i don’t love her or feel the same since i haven’t ask her if she wanted to video chat or talk on the phone before she had to go for 2 weeks and i was upfront and honest and said that i didn’t feel the same but i still loved her and wish we could spend alittle more time together and i was so caught up in trying to fix what i messed up before, doing what ever i can, sacrificing most of my time, i was so caught up in that and i didnt ask much to talk on phone, which i should have, because i was mentally bothered by and angry with myself and i really wished she would of saw that i was trying but no, she flipped and yell with me over the phone and said she was over with me…and i begged her for another chance so she said for those 2 weeks she was away i would be a ‘single man’ and talk to who ever and think about how we could return to our relationship and i spent those 2 weeks thinking about what i could do better, how i could prevent the same mistakes. I talked to no other girls and kept my mind on her for 2 weeks and even made something special for her for our anniversary of 9 months and when she came back she seemed like she didnt want to talk to me much but we talked and she did want to talk about our relationship that day so the next day i apologized for everything i did i really want things to be the same again i really don’t see myself with any one else, just her, and she said she doesn’t know about it this time that she’s tired of getting hurt but she said she woukd give me one more chance to return to my ‘old self’ and that she still loves me and i’m still her number one guy but she only can be close friends with the ‘new me’ and that we’re ‘single’ until i show her that i’m the ‘old me’ and she’s not waiting forever so it’s alot of pressure, here i am about a month later sobbing myself to sleep almost every night, again doing everything i can to fix us, trying to call her everyday, buying her stuff i got her from vacation, writing her a song, making her a card and investing all of my time to her and it still seems like it’s not enough, i honestly still very much love this girl and i don’t know what i would do without her, i really hope our relationship is not damaged beyond repair, i’ve been trying my utmost all every single day since things went south and i don’t know what to do now, i plan on going to her house and giving her the card a stuff i bought her from vacation and also, telling her i love her and giving her a big hig and a kiss but i don’t know if she’ll like it or not…please help, i am literally in despair.

Answer #1

Okay you may think that this is the end of the world, but it really isn’t. You are young and I can tell you that you will probably be in a few more relationships before you find someone who’s right for you. In this moment you might feel like this is what you want forever, but you need to realize that people change and you still have a lot you are going to experience. You have your whole life ahead of you. It would be awesome if you could work things out with your girlfriend, but just understand and prepare yourself if it doesn’t. You two both have a lot of drama in the relationship that you both need to talk about. You both need to stop arguing about little things because its a waste of energy. I can tell you that she will probably love that you bought her gifts and made her stuff and all that, but if for some reason she doesn’t appreciate it and still gives you a hard time then don’t stress. You did all you could do, she’s going to have to give a little too.

Answer #2

Yea, i know it’s not the end of the world but it sure feels like it, i really want to fix this and show her that i do love her instead of just telling her, i something planned hopefully it works, and if not, i don’t know what to do next :/ but i appreciate your help/reply, means alot.

Answer #3

If she doesn’t appreciate what you do then she doesn’t deserve you :)

Answer #4

you’re right, thanks :) i feel alittle better now :)

Answer #5

How many times can you bend something until it breaks? Sounds like an awful lot, don’t you think? Well… Be careful tho because once it does break, it’s game over. And from what you’ve described here it sounds like you are pretty darn close to that point. I must wonder if it’s even worth the effort, considering how much time you’ve invested in this and the crappy response you’ve recieved from her so far. Correct me if I’m wrong but doesn’t it almost seem like as though she wants to move on? I’d think that after all the trouble you went through to try and prove to her that you love her, etc., she just seems to kinda brush it off as not being good enough. Well what will be good enough? What do you have to do to prove your love? I don’t know. Something tells me that she’s already looking into another direction. Don’t force it. If she can’t see that you are for real than she does not deserve all those special treatments. Good luck!

Answer #6

yea…i hope on going to her house and giving her the stuff i got and made for her and talk to her about what i’ve done show my love for her instead of just telling her over text, i really hope this works, nothing has been working thus far and i dont give up easily but if this doesn’t work and is not good enough, i’m afriad i’m out of luck but keep helping me out it makes me feel less bummed out throughout the day

Answer #7

Let us know how it went :)

Answer #8

Sure thing :) wish me luck, i’ll definitely be needing it :)

Answer #9

You got it! :)

Answer #10

Okay, first of all I think this is completely normal. I really feel that regardless every couple goes through this phase eventually. Being with a person for an extended period of time is a BIG deal. You get comfortable with that person, and the “whoo” feeling or the “butterfiles” are not there anymore. That doesn’t mean that you don’t feel the same about each other, or that the feelings have even died. If you really feel like that then maybe the relationship really isn’t what you think it is, or should be. There are gonna be bumps and huge mountains in a relationship. It’s how you get through those bumps and mountains that truly makes your relationship strong and worth something.

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