when do I say I love you

I’ve been with my boyfriend 2 months and basically my friends think its weird I haven’t said I love you yet. But I don’t wanna rush into anything. When do you think is the right time because I really wanna say it but don’t want to scare him off:/

Answer #1

When you mean it. It’s quite normal to have a friend and like them very much, but not be in love with them. Don’t worry about it!

Answer #2

When you know for sure that you really mean it. When you’re completely sure that it’s not just “liking” or a crush. Two months is nothing in a relationship, in fact, in most cases it’s probably much too early to be throwing around the L word. So I think your friends are wrong. Don’t rush it. Make sure you are sure first before saying it.

Answer #3

Don’t say it if you don’t mean it. Who gives a sh!t what your friends think, love isn’t something that you just throw around. The right time is when you actually mean it. I didn’t tell my boyfriend I loved him until 6 months into our relationship…

Answer #4

Depends on how much ‘weight’ you personally choose to put on the word ‘love’. Some people like to psyche themselves out over it, making it into this huge elaborate complexity with a sprinkle of out of the world fantasies….. but on the flip side, there are a bunch of other people who like to throw ‘I love you’s out every two days to a new person (not that they really mean it). — Both of these behaviors are destructive. . If I am with a person I like, I will usually know by the end of a month or two whether we have good chemistry. . Remember: ‘Liking’ someone and ‘being attracted’ to someone are VERY different than sharing a deep feeling of ‘Romantic Chemistry’ with someone. (as cheesy as that might sound) .

  1. Peer Pressure - Saying something or doing something just because your friends ask you to say/do so, is not the best way to go. Use your common sense and rational judgment, only you know your situation - and every situation is somewhat unique. Always keep that in mind. (people usually go where the herd goes) .
  2. Inauthenticity - If you intuitively feel that it’s time you should materialize and solidify your affection toward you partner with a statement like, ‘I love you’ - do so without an iota of resistance. Be authentic and express yourself authentically. Don’t listen to people who advice some bull like, ‘wait 5 months’. That’s straight out incongruence with your real feelings and mechanical robot behavior. .
  3. Brainstorm and Contemplate - Think of all the good experiences you both have shared together and all the feelings he has made you feel. What kind of connection do you think you share? - Is it a ‘like’ and ‘attracted’ connection or a ‘romantic’ and ‘chemistry’ involving connection? Are you both with each other because you like spending time with each other or are you together just because being with each other floats up your social value? (most people these days just ‘hook up’ with the other person to use him/her as a ‘show off’ toy which increases their social value. - Pathetic.) .
  4. Coming from a place of fear - Holding back honest outward expressions of emotions/feelings due to the fear of being judged negatively by your partner will lead to you feeling unconsciously ‘repressed’ and lacking ‘openness’ later in the relationship if it progresses further. .
  5. Rush it/ Not Rush it mentality - I think this is one of the WORST mentalities to have. It’s putting ‘time’ above ‘real feelings’. It’s depending on time to dictate you, when you should express yourself honestly and when you should not. If you feel intense chemistry with a person within the second month of seeing them - HELL yes, jump on it. Don’t be waiting for like the ‘5th’ month to arrive. BUT, if you DON’T feel you share romantic chemistry with the other person YET, DON’T force yourself into saying something you don’t mean - just cause your friends advised you to do so.

The best advice I can give you is, trust your core intuition. Your core intuition is your intuition free from external influences. If it ‘FEELS’ like it’s time you tell him you love him, do so. If it intuitively feels like it’s not the time yet or you are not sure yet, then don’t say it. — However, don’t do anything under the influence of other people’s opinions or the inclination to comply with the conventional ‘normal’ behavior. And yes, definitely do whatever you do unplugged from the ‘rush it/not rush it mentality’. . Your core intuition will always prove to be your best friend if you just decide to comply with it. . –Andrew

Answer #5

You need to say it when you feel it. It may take time but you’ll know when it happens. Don’t rush it or you may regret it. It’ll make you feel better about yourself and he’ll know you truly mean it.

Answer #6

dont think about it. im telling you, when its time, it just slips out of your mouth. it will just be natural. that will be when you really mean it :)

Answer #7

Thank you♥

Answer #8

Thanks xx

Answer #9

Just tell him that you love him.

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